I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Randomize
