I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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