my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
