Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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