i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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