I got chris browned last night
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
