We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I just gargled with NyQuil
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
