Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
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