Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
he answered his phone during sex and left to go help that drama queen with her latest bullshit. I'm drinking all his vodka. it's asshole tax
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
