So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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