carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
