Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Randomize
