when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
dude i'm inner monologue high
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
No exaggeration. At the gas station she handed me the mop from over the counter and told me that's my last drink of the night
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
