You really coming over, don't trick.
I want to have your abortion
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
