I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
