just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
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