please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
I think a kid would responsible me up
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game