the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
I currently don't understand fingers.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
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