No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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