do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Randomize
