Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
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