I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
