we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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