My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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