im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
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