She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
There's a naked man in my car right now.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
