What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
