One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Randomize
