dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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