I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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