I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
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