; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
