you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
