Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
