margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
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