My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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