D3 body, D1 cock
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
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