Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
