I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
We talked him into tasing himself.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Only at Harvard can you walk in on a bunch of stoners and expect everyone to immediately stand up, shake your hand and introduce themselves like we're at a fucking job fair
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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