if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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