I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
I will be naked everywhere
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Randomize