Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
