Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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