ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Im walking to an ob gyn practice session right now. Literally have to get face first in a middleaged vagina in 10 min.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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