But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
She is in my trunk
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
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just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
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Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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