guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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