A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
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