He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
false alarm. still invincible.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
