I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I just found puke in my bra..
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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