Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
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