Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
Randomize
